Sitting in my living room talking about life and God and such with my roommate last night, who, by the way, is probably one of the most genuine, humble persons I know, this thought struck me.
Over the past few months both of us at one point or another have lamented over being completely selfish, giving into our flesh, living out Romans 7- doing the things we don't want to. And even in serving, we often have the attitude that this is to make us look good, rather than to make God look good. We go to PNO's, have Bible studies, plan events for church, all the while begging for people to take a glance at "what we are doing for Jesus."
That's when the image popped into my head. On my 7th grade basketball team there is this cute 6th grader who is half my height, while she tries her hardest, her lack of athleticism and coordination prevents her from playing as many minutes as she would like. Her enthusiasm never fails to astound me though. In fact, everyday whether practice or a game (without fail), she greets me by getting in my bubble and dribbling a ball between her legs. Well, it's more like she lifts one leg over the ball and occasionally her other hand meets it, otherwise it rolls down the court. With a smile from ear to ear she says something like this, "Hi Coach." But what she is really saying is, look at me, I can dribble the ball between my legs, I think I should get to play. All the while, I'm thinking, what are you doing, poor thing? You aren't as talented as it might seem.
I can't help but think that's what we do with God. We go up to Him with our selfish service and say, "God, look at me! I am so good at serving. I do all these things for you. Just look at how deserving I am of your goodness and grace." While He is probably thinking, do you not I know I don't need you to exist. You are nothing. I am everything. I chose you. Not based on your talent level, but because I loved you. I predestined you. And on top of that I gave you those gifts. I am confident God doesn't want those gifts shoved back in His face as a reminder of how good we are, becuase we aren't good. We are sinful, selfish people without His salvation.
I want to stop dribbling the ball between my legs to get God to notice me. First of all, He has already seen me because He saved me. Second, the purpose of this life is not to glorify myself, but to glorify Him and through that enjoy Him forever.
"Oh, praise the One paid my debt and raised this life up from the dead!"